RING PHONE RING

I have a post coming about my recent travels to the exotic beaches of Clearwater Florida but as of right now I'm in the terrible funk of waiting.

I am a contract teacher waiting for a permanent job, but until then I wait for a contract position.

The days are counting down and I pace by the phone. I clean everything. I tried to read but after a page I think "was that the phone?" I check my e-mail constantly. If the phones does ring I always answer with a very professional "hello?" but the subtext is (hello, I am professional and you should hire me). If it's a friend or family member I rush them off the phone even though I have call waiting.

and still...nothing.

I am surrounded by "it will come..", "positive thoughts..", "I'm thinking about you" and my favourite "well don't wait, because a watched pot doesn't boil" - which just makes me angry because yes! yes it does boil! but if you do something else you forget about it and turn around and hear that awful sound of water spilling over onto the element.

..nothing... I wait.

One friend got a job Monday. She called me excited, and truthfully I was excited for her but in the back of my mind I think about why I haven't even gotten an interview. She must have heard my secret thoughts and without hesitation "you'll get your call soon!"

... I keep waiting...

Yesterday another friend and I went out and he told me about his interview for today. After the interview I get a call - it went well, we will see what happens. Hours later -he got it. Hours after the interview! I shouldn't talk that happened to me last year. Again, happy for him but oh I wish I could be excited for me!

...so I wait.

ring phone, ring.