The Good, The Bad and The Ugly

I try to pride myself on being a strong, confident woman but often I get tested - as we all do - and feel apart from my natural person.

In becoming a teacher there are dues to pay, some pass through easy, others have it more difficult. My own journey, although so far short, has only been tested by personal hurdles - a long 6 month battle with a terrible disease, that I inevitable won. (athankyou). Now, the waiting I have been doing is on the cusp of being squashed - a tentative job offer for one semester. A due to be paid - not a full year, just half.

This position has it's pro's and cons and one large, loaded statement of "Jackie the issue is that this position's schedule has one math course"

Living most my life as a storybook, movie or pop culture reference I immediately hear the music from the graveyard duel in "The Good, The Bad and The Ugly" - which if you haven't seen please click here for better reference and go to the 1.42 mark for the best part.

All I could utter was a meek "oh"

Math. My old, but faithful arch enemy. My biggest weakness. The largest hurdle I have yet to beat.

I humbly admitted my weakness and my trepidations with teaching the subject but also stated my unwillingness to let this opportunity pass. I then asked for some time, just half an hour to go through my resources in order to make a better decision. As soon as I put down the phone, I broke down crying and it must have been fate that Dave was working from home to not only console me but to put everything into perspective. After a quick consultation with a friend who teaches math I felt like I was putting together my own Ocean's 11. I had my team ready to help.

I put the call in, stated with pride that I could handle it, I have the resources, I have the dedication and effort to put forth a great course.

The end of the phone call, however, did not end with a congratulations but rather a "we will call you back later on today with the final outcome."

What? So no job? I got worked up to just wait some more.

So here I am, waiting, but hopefully not for long.

RING PHONE RING

I have a post coming about my recent travels to the exotic beaches of Clearwater Florida but as of right now I'm in the terrible funk of waiting.

I am a contract teacher waiting for a permanent job, but until then I wait for a contract position.

The days are counting down and I pace by the phone. I clean everything. I tried to read but after a page I think "was that the phone?" I check my e-mail constantly. If the phones does ring I always answer with a very professional "hello?" but the subtext is (hello, I am professional and you should hire me). If it's a friend or family member I rush them off the phone even though I have call waiting.

and still...nothing.

I am surrounded by "it will come..", "positive thoughts..", "I'm thinking about you" and my favourite "well don't wait, because a watched pot doesn't boil" - which just makes me angry because yes! yes it does boil! but if you do something else you forget about it and turn around and hear that awful sound of water spilling over onto the element.

..nothing... I wait.

One friend got a job Monday. She called me excited, and truthfully I was excited for her but in the back of my mind I think about why I haven't even gotten an interview. She must have heard my secret thoughts and without hesitation "you'll get your call soon!"

... I keep waiting...

Yesterday another friend and I went out and he told me about his interview for today. After the interview I get a call - it went well, we will see what happens. Hours later -he got it. Hours after the interview! I shouldn't talk that happened to me last year. Again, happy for him but oh I wish I could be excited for me!

...so I wait.

ring phone, ring.

Family Packed weekend

BUSY weekend!

On Thursday I was all excited for a night away and as I jumped into a very late shower, Dave was entertaining our "fur children"...

When I got out, this is what I found...

On Friday, my mother and I put the roof down on her convertible (all with many jokes to 'Thelma and Lousie') and drove to Buffalo for some light outlet shopping before turning right around and stopping at our destination - a lovely resort/spa in Niagara. This is one "perk" of her job - she is often invited out on these "fam" trips, "fam" to represent "familiarization" to check out a venue, hotel or other location. This is all to basically wine and dine her into using their facilities for one of her company's big events. My mother works for a very large communications company and she is the director for events in the business sector. Or as I like to call her "the head honcho for parties". Luckily I got to tail along on this trip because it involved the Shaw Festival, and my father was not interested. We were definitely treated well to our dinner and then swept away to see "An Ideal Husband" an Oscar Wilde play at the Shaw Festival. I loved it- I walked away with an excellent stage English accent saying things like "quite so" and "shall we to supper?" We entered our room, tired from a very full day to a lovely arrangement of chocolate covered strawberries, and sugar cookies. I divulged to my mom that if I were in her position I would be easily persuaded to hold events at any location as long as they treated me to chocolate covered strawberries.

The next morning we ate an amazing breakfast and had I not left my phone in the room I would have taken a picture of the glorious breakfast buffet. In my mind I imagine the dining area of heaven to be quite like our breakfast area - white crisp linens overlooking an amazing patio, smells of freshly brewed orange juice and coffee, wafts of pastry breads and breakfast meats pile together to entice every molecule of your being. The white plates of varying sizes offer a strike contrast to the brightly coloured fruit that topples them.

Since we woke up late (God bless the inventor of the "blackout curtains") we were quickly whisked back onto a bus and headed to Hillebrand winery for a tour and of course - an another amazing meal outside.

Pointing out the grapes, with my glass of Trius sparkling wine.

View from my spot at lunch - glorious.

Not to be outdone by my view, Dave sent me what he was looking at...

(yes our cat is on a leash - he loves the outdoors, but we are afraid he will run away, so we just use it as a precaution and we NEVER walk him.)

Mother and daughter team. You can see the resemblance.

Full to the brim, we said our goodbyes and headed back into the convertible back home.

Sunday was the 8th annual family picnic - and as annual as the picnic, came the rain - we still pressed on as usual. As I munched on peppers, greens and fresh tomatoes I laughed with cousins and then spent some great quality time playing with my little 2nd cousin Kyla, letting Dave fend off all the family members saying "you're next!"

Zio with Kyla.

In a wink, we were back in the car off to Dave's parents for an early dinner - which we, still full from the picnic, did not eat - instead we played with our nephew, and watched Blondie play with her cousin Maurice.

My artistic photo...

Some models are so hard to work with..

I am realizing that summer is almost over - we are days away from our 1 year anniversary which will be spent in Florida and I still have so much I want to do!

SLOW DOWN SUMMER!

Show time!

It seems that my past week has been focused on theatre, and I have relished in every moment of it.

Every so often the women in my family gather together for dinner and a show. 3 mothers each with 2 daughters tumble into cars, usually rushing because of work, hair, makeup, clothes or related "disasters". Last Tuesday was one of those beloved nights and the show was "Love, Loss and What I Wore" or more appropriately, the Toronto link here.

5 actresses, including two of my favourite Canadians - Mary Walsh (This Hour has 22 Minutes) and Andrea Martin (SCTV) - sat on high bar chairs with music stands infront holding red binders filled with stories.

The show is based from the stories of a woman named Ilene Beckerman. She retold the story of her life by drawing dresses and giving the significance behind them in a warm and relatable yet deeply personal way. Sisters Nora and Delia Ephron took this small collection and built on it to show the amazing connection of clothing to a woman's life story. The connections are uncanny, and as these 5 women each take on different personas and recount their tales you cannot help but think of similar experiences. More than once my cousins, my sister and I would poke each other, squealing "that's me!" or "that's so you!"

From childhood dresses, gifts from mom, what mom or grandma would say, prom, the dressing room and of course THE CLOSET we found ourselves thinking of my own experiences, and the pieces that shaped our lives.

This started to be the trend this past week - shows that is. On the Tuesday my aunt, a season ticket holder to Mirvish productions passed on her tickets to "Legally Blonde" for the following night (then Wednesday). She had told us about the Broadway show that her and my cousins saw the last time they were in New York in which Kristin Chenoweth (Glee, Wicked, overall Broadway STAR!) played Elle Woods. "She is playing the role here too!" although skeptical, and yet not overly concerned, my sister and I would repeat our Tuesday night out for a little sorella time on Wednesday.

I have to admit, I was pleasantly surprised by the colourful, fun and catchy production of Legally Blonde. The cast played into their roles as the overly dramatic scenes went on, and even still there were glimmers of honest relationships as well as serious moments. During the intermission, my sister and I couldn't help but sing the opening song of "Oh My God!" over and over again. Even though Kristin Chenoweth was not the lead actress, the alternative was amazing and able to carry on the high pitched, bubbly personality that both Elle Woods and Kristin Chenoweth are known for.

The fun did not stop there, but unfortunately this blog must! On the weekend I was able to attend a little getaway with my mom to Niagara where we were wine'd and dine'd and even treated to a show at the Shaw Festival...but more on that later...