Bella Nonna

My grandmother is my hero.

The strongest woman I have, and possibly will ever know.

Earlier this month she turned a fresh new 80 years old. I watch her mind deteriorate but hold steady to the stories she has told me. The life she has lead and the struggles she has endured silently. I always wondered what lessons women would teach their young girls in the old country – before school was allowed. I thought of how quickly you would learn but spending time with my grandma as a young girl and even now as a woman I think time is passing too quickly and there is so much more I need to know.

Basics were covered young - how to clean clothes, mend holes, sew a button, set the table, cook the pasta, make the bed and tuck the sheets in tight. Move quickly but carefully, slowly on stairs – never run why be in a rush to fall.

As I grew older, the lessons were more advanced. What makes a true friend, protect your heart it’s delicate - don’t just let anyone in. Laugh, never let them see you cry, if you fall pick yourself up and always depend on your family to help if it gets hard. Your sister is your best friend – if you don’t know it now, you will later. Trust your parents.

I learnt how to make pasta from scratch never from a box, how to roll gnocchi, split beans, pick the best tomatoes. I learnt the quick burning pain on my bottom from the swift movement she dealt would deal out with the wooden spoon, the metal spoon and most often the slipper (usually a slight wooden heel). Even though I was never beaten I learned respect the old fashioned way and I appreciate every moment of it.

I am her bella nonna, her poopie, the one who doesn’t call, the who doesn’t visit her…I am just like the other 8 who belong to this elite league. Even though we share the title of “grandchild” and we are all told the same things as the others time after time there are still those private moments where she shares her soul with us, one on one. We are all special to her and she makes us feel it.

I pray to God that she will be with us for many more years but yet I hear her voice in my head – one of the greatest lessons she ever taught to me –

“Bella Nonna, you cannot pray for what you want, you can only pray for the strength through whatever is given”

Valentine Sushi

Another successful Valentines Day!

It seems that all the questions were surrounding our plans for Valentines Day - “First Valentines Day as a married couple, what are you going to do?” My usual response would be a blank stare and a quick “same thing we do every valentines…try to take over the world!” but in all honesty - Dave and I have had a standing plan of sushi and movie for the past few years and I don’t intend to ever change them – I am a sucker for tradition.

This year, we replaced our movie with a TV show. We bought the first volume of Glee after many rave reviews and a few caught episodes. I am a huge fan of musicals, and even though the show has nothing to do with them I still feel it is necessary to sing along – you know, for full viewer appreciation. After watching the first few episodes on Saturday Dave got me the CD, so I could still sing along anytime I wanted - just not with him right beside me. On Sunday I cleaned the house while Dave was at hockey and I blasted the volume 1 soundtrack – with half the episodes still to go I was worried about ruining the plot. I kept thinking of what each song would mean to the characters. When Dave got home I heard the soundtrack coming from our bathroom speakers – obviously he felt this new need to sing along too.

It wasn’t hard to get hooked, for myself I am a sucker for unrequited love - perhaps because that summed up my entire high school life. I began to yell at the TV at Terry or Quinn, and even though incredibly good looking, I would still be angry with Puck. Together we giggled at the insane OCD of Emma, and I quietly wished for her awesome food containers. When we finished the last episode over our last bites of spicy salmon, and tuna sashimi we were left in an immediate withdraw. We found out that the next episodes would not be until spring. “That’s good though – we only have ‘Lie to Me’ during the spring.” Dave’s positive outlook only highlighted our strong relationships with TV shows…thank goodness for PVR or else we would be slaves to an unruly TV schedule.

A fantastic Valentines Day – and what better way to follow up such a day then with a peaceful, restful Family Day…. but more on that later.

boys will be boys

Coaching the senior boys basketball team I have learnt many things...

- boys can eat a tremendous amount of food and just when you think it's over...it's not

- each boy thinks they alone can save the game (so much for team sport)

- the coach is ALWAYS wrong unless the decision is to put them in the game

- attitude can change with just one missed shot

- let boys be angry, let them walk away from frustrations, most times they will return calmer

- don't criticize a boy face to face, even in sports, stand beside them and speak shoulder to shoulder. If you don't you will face a screaming match, if you do you will get a sincere and appropriate response.

- boys still want to be hugged and told they are good

I have just finished day 3 of 5 straight days with my senior boys team and this is just a short list of things I have learnt in my months with them - let alone these past days.

Most importantly...don't call them boys - they are young men.