A year in review...

"I've never tried to block out the memories of the past, even though some are painful, I don't understand people who hide from their past. Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now." - Sofia Loren

As we were nearing closer to the end of 2009 the common phrase said to me was "I bet you can't wait to say goodbye to 2009!" In reality I spent much of 2009 very sick, in hospital or in bed. Many tears and many "I can't do this anymore" and then even more tears losing Lindsay and Bernie- But - but here I sit reflecting on the year and even as the tears come, I can't help but think of moving to our home, getting married, dancing with my dad at the wedding, the engagement of my sister to Danny, getting a full year position at the school I had to leave, the birth of my nephew Ivan Alexander, and the births of my cousins Gracie and Kyla.

So, I present to you - a year in review - in pictures....

January - Me and Babbo on the night Dave and I moved into our new house (no pictures of moving - so this will have to do..) This was also the first night of sickness - medication was not working, and the first round of tests was scheduled.

February - Hired for my first LTO - Religion grade 10 and English grade 12 College. Very excited to "get my feet wet". Here I am working hard in front of the TV, planning my lessons.

March - week before March break, I decide to skip out on Monday's "24", and a while later Dave hears my screams for help as I am doubled over in pain. Admitted to emerg. spent 10 days in hospital. No actual picture of the night, but another emerg. photo will have to sub-in.

April - Admitted, once again, to hospital the day of parent-teacher interviews. New found problem of an abscess now complicates diagnosis and treatment. Had to resign from my position at work from my hospital room. Wedding put on hold due to unknown future of my health. Hooked to picc line, that "fed" me - had dreams of eating for days...

May - Transferred to Mt. Sinai, keeping positive vibes flowing. Spent both mother's day and my mothers birthday with my mom by my side from 7:30am until 7:00 pm. God bless that woman. At 7:00pm Dave would come after a hard day's work and stay would hold my hand until I fell asleep. Hospital stay ended after 3 and a half weeks.

May - Also my sister's birthday in which she got engaged AT DISNEY! (good for you Danny!) Was home from hospital and could "enjoy" her engagement party. Downside of my illness = no energy, and I fell asleep half way through the day.

June - After failed attempts of new treatments, I am waiting to hear about surgery dates. Knowing that I have planed a wedding for August the doctor makes time for me in her very booked schedule so I can be healed in time to dance at my own wedding. For weeks I waited growing weaker each day. Not being able to eat anymore, doctor says to keep hydrated and soon I was not able to even drink water. Was admitted to emergency 4 days before scheduled surgery. Family would stay vigilant at bedside. Here a bedside brickbreaker blackberry tournament.

June 22 - Surgery day! FINALLY!

A special note about love. Love is not always the romance the movies portrays. It can be ugly; it can be watching your loved one in pain for months and not be able to do anything. Love is travelling an hour just to pick up wedding RSVPS only to travel an hour back to the hospital so your soon to be wife would have a bright point in her day. My friends, love is sleeping on a makeshift bed when "visiting" hours are over.

July - A new woman, with a new leash of life.
I am surprised with an impromptu bachelorette at my favourite restaurant!

Dave and I are 2 weeks away from our own wedding, and we celebrate the marriage of two great friends - Tamir and Michelle


August - on the 15th I marry my best-friend at my "Old Hollywood" dream wedding - walk down the aisle to "our" song in a string quartet version, had a fantastic live band, was surrounded with our amazingly supportive family and friends - and did I mention the candy bar!?!


I dance with my Babbo to Dean Martin

We honeymoon in San Fran - and I ride the rails, walk for hours and eat some amazing seafood.

September - Now hired for a full year at the school I had to sadly leave when I first got ill - I am excited to prove myself as a teacher. I also turn 26 with 3 ladies who have always stood by me.

October - I wait...I wait..and WAIT for my little niece or nephew to arrive....I giggle as he turns and kicks

November - on the 25th I get news that a dear friend has passed away suddenly...I make arrangements with friends to make the trip to Waterloo and attend the service. A beautiful setting with music and pictures playing to commemorate a wonderful man - Bernie you are a dear and wonderful friend and I will miss you.

On the day of the funeral, I am leaving school to change and meet my ride - I get a call - the most inspirational woman and friend I have even known has lost her battle against a brain tumor that plagued her for 5 years. B-Strong, a foundation she created will win the war in her memory. I cried even harder at Bernie's funeral thinking how the world has lost two amazing people so soon.

Driving home from Bernie's funeral I get a text message that Lauren has given birth - Dave's cousin is a father and we are extended cousins to Gracie Hope

On Friday November 27, my heart hurts as I wear my B-strong hat to school and even though I am grateful for the blessing of Gracie in our lives, I still think of my two dear friends. At 11:56 I get a call that Emily has gone in to labour and very soon I will be a Zia (aunt)
That evening, I meet my nephew - Ivan Alexander and through tears I tell him "You came at the perfect time"

December - Dave buys us our first Christmas tree together - and his first tree EVER!

Ivan celebrates his first Hanukkah with the family.

..and on the 27, one month after Ivan, my cousin Kelly gave birth to her beautiful daughter Kyla

As difficult as 2009 was - I would not trade it for the world. Maybe it's the Libra in me but as Sofia Loren says - this has made me the person I am today.